These days, I'm slowly becoming pessimistic. And I try my best to be optimistic about it. Optimistic pessimism. I don't know but I think I'm a person who often thinks that everything will really be okay when I know, somewhere down there, it won't. There's too much negativity and all those stuff associated with sadness, gloom, doom etc., going around my head right now.. And I still keep on hoping and believing that "in the end, it will all be okay". What did I ate earlier? Does it make any sense?
It's been a month now since my last update (take note! I used "update" instead of "post" haha) about the awesome things that happened in my life. So many things, be it good or bad, happened in the most untimely time in my life I cannot remember all of them to make this blog update more... reasonable anymore. Everything was just spontaneous. But really, I've been making drafts on my so called updates that never really reached any blogging site. All those drafts just stayed where they were, in paper. However, at this time around, I will try to give justice to the pen and paper I used while drafting.
Let's have quick backtrack, shall we? No? C'mon! You don't have any other choice... Remember my Happy New Year Post? Yes. That empty and boring post during the last day of good old year 2010. Ahhhh~ If I remember correctly, I was so excited then. Excited to tell you guys my story. But I was unable to do so because of some factors which I do not and cannot really remember anymore. And that's not really the topic here.. Aside from my realization that I post too much swear words on the Internet (what a realization!), the lack of grammar in most of my posts were evident too. But I do not really regret nor get embarrassed by it. It's okay. No one cares.
I was about to tell you how happy we were during Christmas Eve of 2010. It was one of the very few occasions that I (and my cousins, except their birthdays) look forward to every year. Christmas Season is the time for merry making. But before all the fun, we always see it to we attend the Misa de Gallo that starts on Dec. 16 and lasts for 9 days. It is comparable to a Novena mass for the birth of Jesus. We also went out, dined at a restaurant and ate Balut for the first time! I also had a great time with my friends since high school who I personally call as my gang. We even celebrated our 4th Year Anniversary! How cool is that?
Boy, how will I possibly end this? xD
Let's just say after all those fun and laughter, we also received not so good news. When Mom went to the doctor and had her breasts examined (she's been feeling pain since her college days), she was advised to undergo a physical test I just couldn't remember. Afterwards, she was told to undergo a surgery and have those "lumps" removed just in case it's cancerous. Please note that I'm not that familiar with medical terms so, yeah. Our family has a history of breast cancer. We also have a history of cervical cancer. We did not really have the money, even the capacity to produce the certain money needed in a span of one month. It was December then when Mom went to the doctor and you know how hard it was for me knowing there's a possibility I couldn't see my Mom anymore?
But then again, this is but an update. Seriously, typing and telling you these things is hard for me as well. Don't worry, I have cried enough already and though tears still continue to fall, I'm still here standing. And smiling.
After all, it all went "okay".
