Note that this was posted on December 5th and that the blog owner of this blog (lol) forgot to post this post here so yeah, late post is late post = big fail. Anyways, read on though I could not guarantee you perfection and satisfaction of any sort.
and I'm wearing my not so favorite pink hoodie, (lulz with the emphasis) with a green shittty undershirt paired with my old but comfy gray pair of shorts (not micro mini, btw) while drinking a cup of milk made my Mummie~
The past few days were... erratic. The weather changes every now and then. My mood too. And I find it funny how it was like that last week. First, I was bitching on the whole DBSK "disbandment" thing and up to now at this very moment I am still. Then, there's the ever so random weather fluctuations; I remembered one time it was around 3pm and it was really sunny yet it was raining. ZOMG. Global Warming.
After that, there were other more serious things like family stuffs, friend stuff and all the "Crap, it's 2010 already and two years from now is gonna be the end of the world." Also, there's Team Jacob and Team Edward flags flailing in the air, people starts asking silly questions like: Would you want to be a vampire or a werewolf? And there's the stupid "Don't see it alone" movie in which I think should have been "Don't watch it alone". Though it DOESN'T really make any sense, I just want to post that up, lol.
Lately, I was contemplating on some certain things. Things like, what I really wanna do when I grow up, the things I should be prioritizing now that I am still young and will still be able to correct those little mistakes, how stupid I was the past year, how 2009 has changed me so far, the good and the bad that I have done, the memories I will treasure most, and those other stuffs you think are of no significant value until you really realize, "Ah~ so this why this is here for. "
A week ago after Mum and I had lunch in a little food shop near our place, we went to this salon and had our nails painted with whichever color we preferred. Mum did her toenails while I asked the manicurist to do my fingernails. I thought it was useless to have my toenails painted because I'm using close shoes anyways. It's better to show off my fingernails, lol. So yeah, I had my fingernails painted with Red. Sorry, no picture available. XD My hands are not to pretty, sorry Jae~ lol.
And so, while the manicurist was doing her job, I was scanning some magazines and I saw this random page of National Inquirer Newspaper (wait, isn't it a Magazine?) with Jim Carrey's face on it. I was
Anyways, the article was about him and how he has undergone an emotional state or phase in his happy life and that he was thankful because if it weren't for his daughter, Jane, he would not have known where he was right now.
He said and I quote:
My priorities were different earlier on. But life has a way of showing you. First you have to experience sheer loneliness. You go through a period feeling kind of vacant. Then you realize, "Oh- that's what other people are here for".
It really struck me. I mean, I was feeling all lonely during the last quarter of this year. But I'm not saying I was always sad or lonely. Or maybe I was just overly analytical and that I'm just exaggerating as per always. But I noticed, after every time I was sad, there is always happiness. Like, there's a rainbow always after the rain thing.
I also find it stupid how in almost all occasions, there is always a plus and a minus. If say in a week, I was happy on Monday up to Wednesday but on Thursday and Friday I'm so... so sad. And then on a Saturday everything is fine again, and you know... that crap? I mean, I always try to make my self believe that it's always gonna be a happy ending. That everything will all be okay, even if it isn't. Because in reality, it really is not.
Sigh.
Okay, enough will all the drama. That was.. just some of my pent up emotions. I don't have any other outlet because facebook is well~ blah. Some people in my f-list (in facebook) who are also in my f-list in real life would comment and say, "Are you alright?" or "Are you okay" which answer is obviously not and I can't really go and say, "SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GO AWAY" because they might get offended and all. I mean, why do I have to be always the one who should be understanding other people? Why can't I have a day-off and be a misunderstanding just for one day and hope people would understand? Gosh, that was random.
I'm sorry for being gay today. I think I had a little much more on the sugar. Today actually is my 17th year and 4th month living in planet Earth. I don't really celebrate my.. monthday? or whatever, lol. But just for the lulz. The last time it was an upset stomach, then a pain somewhere in the middle of my palm (similar to that of Jesus Christ nailed to the cross), thirdly back pains, afterwards it was a sore throat which I think is a Pharyngitis, I forgot to go to our School Clinic last Friday because Zarah, Opel and I had fun at the mall after Zarah bought a SuJu album. LMAO~ and finally, headaches. I think I am okay now so no need to worry. :P
Hokay, this is getting a bit longer than I have expected so, I will just try to enumerate or list down whatever was up to me lately so yeah, here it goes:
October: second semester in College, my schedule is sucky but I will post it really, the soonest. kinda okay month but saddening and depressing.
November: a big pain in the arse. I swear, I had to attend two different debut parties but it was really fun. I just didn't like how the preparation went, with all the make-up and the hair styling and shits, damn this is why I've always wanted to be a boy. Mum, here that? LMAO good thing Mum doesn't have a journal, but she has facebook so that explains why I am here.
December: is sad, cold and chilly. few more days and it will be 2010. I don't really know what to expect. Especially in the next year's National Elections, with all the killing, massacres, crime and violence and all~ people are getting greedier as the year changes. Sigh. The unlawfulness, all the bias-ness, the shittyness and all.
GAH! I'd like to stop from thinking about more serious stuffs like school but these social issues are getting into my nerves. I can't just let myself not be involved with it. As much as I try not to be involved I really just can't.
"perhaps to Yoochun life is the nightmare and dreams are his real life."
Anyways, SHINee came here in the Philippines last Nov. 27th but I was not able to see them because I did not have enough moolah to buy myself a ticket and fly to Manila (because I live in Cebu). It would already be a great just to be able to see Onew, Jonghyun, Minho and Key at the airport and go *flail* at the guards, lol. I was able to see fancams and fan shots though so it was okay. If it was DBSK, I WILL DEFINITELY FLY TO MANILA AND KIDNAP YOOSU AND CHANGMIN. HAHAHAHA. YUNJAE CAN STAY TOGETHER, LOL.
SPEAKING OF DBSK, IT WAS JUST ANNOUNCED TODAY THAT DBSK'S MIROTIC LIVE ALBUM CONCERT IN KOREA WILL FINALLY BE SOLD HERE IN THE PHILIPPINES AND THAT THE DAY WILL BE ON DECEMBER 15TH WHICH HAPPENS TO BESU!BUTTJUNSU'S BEERDAY! I HEARD UNIVERSAL RECORDS WILL BE RELEASING 3 DBSK/TVXW ALBUMS (MIROTIC LIVE, THE SECRET CODE AND MIROTIC VER.C) AND I AM SO GONNA BUY ALL OF THOSE.
I DON'T CARE ANYMORE IF SM GETS ALL THE MONEY. AFTER ALL IT'S ALL ABOUT DBSK, SO YEAH. OMFG. IM TALKING-COCK. O_O
All caps failness. lol. Anyways, though that is a happy thing. THSK Bigeastation will be finishing its broadcast by the end of December. I was never really the one who looks forwards to radio shows of the boys, but whenever I get the chance to listen, I do. It's just, maybe it was a good thing for me because I was not that "involved" with the radio show so I won't have a hard time "letting go". But I can't help but feel for those who translates it to English and the subbers as well. I know it will be hard for them. Sigh. I'm trying to be positive that maybe, just maybe there'll be a Bigeastation Season 2 by 2010. I believe the radio show has 141 episodes already. 59 more for it to reach 200. XD But maybe they are cutting it to 150. IDK. Just~ *cries*
an excerpt from
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kage12 's fic, Gone For So Long.Maybe this line true. But not Yoochun though, lol. Gah. This reminds me of another rant about our Philosophy class. @__@ I will try to post something more coherent tomorrow or sometime. And with pics. l
Now that I think of it, more people prefer dreams than reality. Maybe there's fantasy, noh?
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